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It's All About...Less Regrets

Wednesday, March 5, 2014 - 6:45am
Stacey Giatras

My thoughts for several weeks now have been revolving around making choices that I can feel good about later.  I chose not to use the phrase 'no regrets' in the title because as hard as we may try, we will certainly fall short at times, but I know the peace that comes when I truly have done my best.

            Something that I have been trying to do for a while, but haven't made time for nearly enough is simply eating lunch with my kids at school.  Oh, it takes a little planning and preparation and....time.  But then most important things do.  When I walked in to the school to eat with my son today, he beamed—literally beamed.  He felt so special that we would take a little time to come be with him and he even gave me a hug... and a kiss...in front of his friends;  which sort of made me beam.  How often I have let this magical opportunity pass by because it was easier to just stay home and attend to all the other things that take up my time.  Truly one of my biggest challenges is to not let "busy" take over my life.

            This quote from Laura Vanderkam bluntly highlights the importance of choosing what to do with one’s time: “Instead of saying “I don’t have time,” try saying “It’s not a priority,” and see how that feels. Often, that’s a perfectly adequate explanation. I have time to iron my sheets, I just don’t want to. But other things are harder. Try it: “I’m not going to edit your résumé, sweetie, because it’s not a priority.” “I don’t go to the doctor because my health is not a priority.” If these phrases don’t sit well, that’s the point. Changing our language reminds us that time is a choice. If we don’t like how we’re spending an hour, we can choose differently.”

            One of the biggest regrets people have is how they treated someone.  When I was young, my parents told us a story in Family Home Evening about a young boy who had yelled at his mother in the morning and left for school upset.  When he came home, his mother had been in an accident and was dead.  This story never left me and I have always tried to not part ways with a loved one leaving anger between us.  I also happen to have some very vivid memories of things adults that were important in my life said to me when I was "just a kid."   The reality is that kids grow up and become adults... and remember the things people said to them.  I try to remember that with my kids.  And I don't want to regret making my kids feel like they are less important than adults just because they are young for now.

            Well, I could go on and on about wasted opportunities, letting potential talents go undeveloped, and etc., but the last thought of my ramblings is this: In our quest for 'No Regrets' in those times we do fall short, it is imperative that we forgive ourselves and move forward because, as Oscar Wilde so bluntly stated, "Every saint has a past and every sinner has a future."