The New Year brings resolutions not to repeat the same negative things that have happened to us in the past. One of them for me this year is learning to stay away from people that do toxic things. “Toxic” things have become a social game to many, as there are more problem with abuse, bullying and just plain toxic things in today’s life.
There are 5 big things to watch for in people. If they have these traits you may want to steer clear, as it can be toxic to you and others around. There’s an expression that we are “the average of the five people we spend the most time with.” One way to get more of anything in life (happiness, money, a sense of peace and calm) is to surround yourself with people who already have that thing you desire and to avoid people who bring you down.
· Takers are people who always need you, but doesn’t give back in return. If someone is always asking for favors without reciprocating, unless it’s your very young child, it’s time to set boundaries with this person.
· If a person is physically, mentally or emotionally abusive, it’s very important to distance yourself from them. Take care of yourself by avoiding those who hurt you. Criticism is incredibly harmful in any relationship. If you’re receiving more judgment than appreciation, something needs to change.
· Contempt is one of the main predictors of unhealthy relationships. If someone is dismissive, rolling their eyes at you, or treating you with contempt, it is not OK.
· Energy lechers: Is someone who always seems to drag you down or deplete you, if you spend a lot of time with someone who brings you down, you’re going to feel worse. The solution is quite simple: spend less time with that person.
· “Bubble poppers”: Are people who ask skeptical questions about your exciting news. Instead of being happy for you, although it comes from a well-intended place and concern for you, they just need to save it and be happy for you at the moment.
Wow! This all sounds like a great game plan, and I hope by just being aware of these things it will help me and hopefully others in seeing the situations that are toxic, so we can help avoid the pit falls of the negativity.
